I’ll never forget the call. It changed everything. It was a beautiful day in early June, and I was on my way home after spending time laying on the beach with a friend. The phone rang and my tired husband’s voice was on the other end of the line.
We had been caught in a scam. The $60,000 that was supposed to have been sent as a down-payment on our first home after 18 years of marriage was sent to a scammer.
It was surreal to say the least. The first thing I said to my husband was not to worry… it was all going to be okay. Then I remember immediately slipping into gratitude, being grateful for the fact that we had only lost money – not one of our six beautiful children, just money. A year before, this wouldn’t have been the case. I would have freaked out and immediately fallen into worry and fear… instead of gratitude and trust.
What happened? What was the catalyst to changing my mindset & heart?
It can be summed up in one word. Gratitude.
Taking a quick step back, my husband, Trent, and I had been through a lot in our marriage. We had six kids, multiple moves, suffered through the 2008 housing recession by living with relatives for three years, couldn’t find a steady job, and then had to pick ourselves back up after it all.
It was hard not to have an immediate negative reaction every time something went wrong. We were tired, overwhelmed and struggling.
In early 2018, we decided to improve our mindset and heartset. For our family, that involved family prayer in the evening and trusting more in God. We began to count our blessings and work on our attitude of gratitude.
So when we were scammed in the early summer of 2018, this is the first time in my life I was capable of responding to bad news with gratitude and hope.
Immediately following the scam, I went to a conference where I listened intently to Shawn Achor (author of, “The Happiness Advantage”). He spoke about neuroplasticity and how we can improve our brain function to help it create new pathways allowing us to live a happier and more joy-filled life. How? By practicing gratitude daily.
He said science proves that we can’t just say, “I’m grateful for my husband, my job and my kids.” That doesn’t really work. We need to be specific and feel the emotion of gratitude when we say, think or write it.
That year, we began a new tradition in our household. My husband bought journals for each of us, and when we gather for family prayer in the evenings, we write down three specific things for which we are grateful.
It’s amazing how much our lives have changed from this simple practice. I’ve never been so happy. We’ve experienced struggles, but through it all, I constantly go back to gratitude. I ask myself, “What is something GOOD about this situation? What can I learn from this? How can I grow? What can I be grateful for?”
My friend, if science makes one thing clear, it’s this – gratitude (faith-based or not) is life-changing and absolutely necessary for a happy and joy-filled life.
My challenge to you – be intentional about the practice of gratitude. Make a commitment to yourself every day to think of and write down three specific things for which you are grateful. For this practice to transform your life, it requires emotion – sink into the feeling of thanksgiving when you’re focusing on your three specific gratitudes.
Over time, you will automatically turn to gratitude throughout your day. You might even find you’re happier, more positive and looking at life whith a whole new perspective.
If you would like some extra love and support on this journey, hop on over to our group on Facebook and lean in with the Woman Genius community. We’d love to welcome you! (Sorry boys… girls only!)
Woman Genius Co-Founder, Michelle Hillaert, is an International Woman’s Personal Development Coach helping women transform their lives from struggling and stuck into living a wholehearted and fulfilled life. Being a mom of 6 kids, Michelle is intimately attuned with the needs of a busy woman striving to stay ahead while still being “good enough.”
Michelle is a recovering perfectionist who gets a woman’s desire to be better and to do better. She is a website design and branding geek, avid blogger, Best Selling Author, contestant in the Mrs. Virginia 2016 pageant and passionate about Living Fearlessly.